Erectile Dysfunction (ED) in your relationship
In clinical research, men have consistently identified three things as essential to achieving satisfactory sexual intercourse:
- the ability to get an erection;
- an erection of sufficient hardness to penetrate; and
- keeping the erection long enough to have an orgasm.
It is a medical fact that, at some point in their lives, the majority of men experience some difficulty in one of these three areas. If it happens to you once or twice, it should not worry you. But if it becomes more than an occasional difficulty, then you may have erectile dysfunction (ED). This is a problem with a cure. Cialis is a reliable and effective treatment. There is no reason to remain inactive. Talk to your physician and get some treatment.
One thing is certain. Your partner has already noticed that something has changed in your physical relationship. This may be because you have actually found it difficult or impossible to maintain an erection while with her, or because you have begun to avoid opportunities for intimacy. But, so far, you have not discussed the matter with her and she is left to deal with her own emotions as she thinks fit.
This lack of communication can be very destructive. Your partner may simply conclude that you have stopped loving her or found someone else or that you have contracted an unfortunate disease and no longer have sex with her to avoid passing it on. The sooner you start a conversation with her the better. All your silence does is to allow the worst of her fears to dominate. She will become bitter because she is excluded from your life and may well vote with her feet if you no longer have sex with her and do not explain the reason.
This is an emotional minefield and you may well not be sure how to start a conversation on a topic of such sensitivity. Although it is actually no better and no worse than any other discussion once you break the ice, we offer the following possible themes as an opening gambit.
“I’m a bit worried. My erections are no longer hard and I don't know what’s wrong.”
“I've been thinking about going to see our physician to ask for advice about my erection problems."
“Do you think it might be my diabetes/high blood pressure/high cholesterol that’s causing me to have these problems in bed?"
“I've been reading about how diabetes/high blood pressure/high cholesterol can affect my ability to get an erection. I’m worried I may have one of these conditions. I’m going to go ask my physician to have a look at me."
“I've been looking round the internet and I’ve seen this drug Cialis. It’s supposed to help with erections. I’ve been thinking of going to ask my physician about it."
Once you start a conversation with your partner, this gives you a chance to be more open and honest about your fears. By involving your partner, you make her a part of the solution to your problems. Because you show her that you still love and trust her, this will reinforce the partnership. With her on your side, you should soon have your sexual life together back on track.
A word to your partner
Good communication is the basis of a strong relationship. If you are talking, this is a good sign. You trust each other. This is a partnership where you help each other out when there are problems. Unfortunately, erectile dysfunction is a particularly sensitive problem for most men. It represents one of their deepest fears. There are major barriers to overcome before most men can talk freely about it.
You should not blame yourself in any way. Erection problems are not your fault. It has nothing to do with whether your man is still attracted to you. It does not suddenly show that your relationship is damaged. You may well sense that your partner is under pressure. That he may feel that he is somehow not the man he was because he can no longer have sex with you in the same old way. You cannot be afraid of hurting his feelings. If he will not bring up the subject, you should. There are many different reasons, some of them quite serious medical conditions, why a man may experience erectile dysfunction. If only to rule out the most serious possibilities, you should get him to a physician sooner rather than later, Some of these conditions can become less easily treated if they go undiagnosed for too long.
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